Invite friends and family to read the obituary and add memories.
We'll notify you when service details or new memories are added.
You're now following this obituary
We'll email you when there are updates.
Select your format and elements to print
Invite friends and family to read the obituary and add memories.
We'll notify you when service details or new memories are added.
You're now following this obituary
We'll email you when there are updates.
Select your format and elements to print
She was warm, curious, cheerful, genuinely interested in people, and had a terrific sense of humor.
Sharon Kathleen Joan Mary Dalton Hays passed away peacefully and unexpectedly on September 7, 2026. She had been in memory care since February, visited daily by her husband and family, and recently had been feted at a belated friends and family celebration of her 85th birthday.
Sharon was the wife and partner in love and life of John Hays, mother of Meghan (David Crampton) Hays and Samantha (Jimmy) Gushner, as well as foster mother to Maureen (Chris) Harriman, Brian Kasianowicz, and Robert “Mack” (JoEllen Reed) MacAleer. She was Nana to Hazel (Noah Rayman) and Henry Crampton-Hays, and Clara and Theo Gushner; new Great-Nana to Matilda Rayman; and sister-in-law to Tom (Sue) Hays. She also leaves behind her beloved younger brother Joseph "Joe" (Donna Burnell) Dalton and his family, including daughters Emma and Jillian and their spouses and children. Her younger sister Susie predeceased her in 2013.
Sharon was born on July 7, 1941 in Kearny, New Jersey and as her birthday was on 7-7, she always felt an affinity for the number 7. When she was in primary school she moved with her family from Queens, New York to Cedar Rapids, Iowa where her father had been hired as a radio engineer at Collins Radio Company. She was puzzled when she didn't see any bunnies as they got off the train in Cedar Rapids, as she thought she was moving to ‘See The Rabbits.’
After attending Washington High School and the University of Wisconsin-Madison (Class of 1963), she joined the Peace Corps, then moved to Boston where she and her new husband John helped to found DARE, Direct Action Rehabilitation Enterprises, a nonprofit dedicated to providing teenagers otherwise relegated to institutional foster care and juvenile detention with loving and stable home settings and surrogate parents. Sharon and John first served as house parents at Hillside House in the Roxbury Crossing neighborhood of Boston, then in 1971 moved to Kezar Falls, Maine where they established Merrymeeting Farm, a rural setting with the same intent. Together with Sharon’s younger brother Joe and the teenagers who joined them at the farm including Brian, Mack, and Maureen, Sharon and John managed a working farm consisting of cows, horses, sheep, goats, pigs, chickens, ducks, geese, a peacock, hayfields, pine forests, sugar maples, fruit trees and vegetable gardens. Sharon also pursued a law degree at the University of Maine at the same time.
She cared deeply about others and spent her life engaged with the causes and ideals she believed in.
In 1977, John’s parents invited Sharon and John to take over the family business, a retail boutique called The Phoenix, which since 1955 had been selling Mexican clothing, jewelry, art and handicrafts in Washington, DC. Thinking they would try it for a year, Sharon and John packed up their daughters, a golden retriever, and a chicken, and moved from the farm to the big city. When John’s father unexpectedly died soon after, they decided to remain in DC and run the store. Sharon’s brother Joe stayed on to run Merrymeeting Farm.
When DARE downsized and closed its other out-of-state group homes, Sharon converted Merrymeeting Farm into its own nonprofit, established a board of trustees filled with community friends and neighbors, wrote grants, raised funds, and hired staff. She traveled from Washington DC to Maine many times, driving an old station wagon up and down the East Coast. The farm continued to provide a loving permanent home environment for teens in state care for many years.
As if she wasn’t busy enough, Sharon also simultaneously opened a branch of The Phoenix in Portland, Maine. She discovered a worn down gem of an old building on Fore Street whose asbestos billboard hid a gorgeous arched window. Sharon renovated the building and restored the window – and while the Portland Phoenix no longer occupies the space, the building’s window is still frequently photographed as an example of downtown Portland historic architecture.
Sharon and John continued to run the Phoenix for years, traveling to Mexico on buying trips and building relationships with talented artisans and their families all over the country. Over the years their daughter Samantha took over more of the store’s operations, and when Sharon and John retired, they handed over the reins completely to Samantha, the third generation.
Sharon and John loved to travel. When their daughters were younger, they brought the family on bicycling, horse caravan, and canal boat adventures in Ireland, France, and England. They would often take a sailboat out for a week or two exploring such places as Greece, the Caribbean, and the Chesapeake Bay. Later they joined friends and family on excursions to Alaska, India, and Egypt. Sharon and John also took their business acumen abroad, volunteering for the International Executive Service Corps, which sent them on assignment to Kyrgyzstan, Namibia, Zambia, Jordan, Georgia, and Thailand.
Sharon and John were both fiercely progressive in their politics. As recent college graduates they participated in the 1963 March on Washington, and their subsequent work reflected their commitment to social justice. Sharon, always the community organizer, helped to found the Palisades Village, one of the earliest ‘Village’ projects now found all around the country that allow people to age in place in their homes by coordinating volunteers who pay visits and run errands for their older neighbors. Sharon served on the Palisades Village board for many years, and was active in their fundraising efforts. As dementia took hold in her last decade, she and John became frequent recipients of the same Village visits and care that she had made possible.
Sharon had a sunny personality and an extraordinary ability to make friends wherever she went. She was warm, curious, cheerful, genuinely interested in people, and had a terrific sense of humor. She cared deeply about others and spent her life engaged with the causes and ideals she believed in.
But most of all, she was the heart of her family. She was a devoted wife, mother, grandmother, sister, and friend.
Sharon lived with dementia for the last decade of her life. In many ways, she left us long before we lost her physically. But we are grateful for the many years when she was fully herself, and for the imprint she left on our family and on so many people whose lives she touched.
To send flowers or plant a memorial tree in memory, please visit our flower store.
Visits: 48
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the
Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
Service map data © OpenStreetMap contributors